Current Drink

Alchy Cherry Coke 3 shots of Cherry Brandy (or similar. Cherry vodka is REALLY great.) 3 shots of Vodka (plain) Fill the glass up with Coke (liquid one) of your choice. I am using Pepsi MAX and a 3/4 pint glass. O, man, I need this, and deserve this.

Who Needs Sleep

I have SO much to do and haven't been able to be up before 5pm.
(Can't sleep till dawn.)
By that time EVERYTHING is closed, and it IS the end of a year time,
many places are never open anyway.
God, I just want my car to start, so I can go away.
Let me go away, with my dogs...

---

Who needs sleep?
Well you're never gonna get it
Who needs sleep?
Tell me what's that for
Who needs sleep?
Be happy with what you get
And there's a guy that's been awake
since the second world war

---

It was Official

and once again, I hate Christmas. Suites me, I am not christian anyway.

Do You Think

Yoko Ono started all of this? Coz we don't think she's hot, never was, and never will. If she did, then we'd better gang up and kill that woman. I do, somehow, think she has really nothing to do with this, she is above all that, or, more like, ...WHAT THE HELL IS SHE???? (A cave woman??)

Shopping (What was your best shopping this year??)

The best thing I bought this year (so far) was; Compact Heated Eyelash Curler. It was only a quid to buy, and it REALLY x3 works. I am in love with this thing. My stubborn eyelashes are now standing like they just watched Citizen Kane for the first time. The worst thing I bought this year has to be; Panasonic DMR-E55. Spent all my birthday money on this junk, I could have gone for a Sanyo budget model and would be happy as Bailey. This shite don't even takes DVD-RW. And I can't afford DVD-RAM, they cost like a tenner each! I keep taping things with all these commercials, PERMANENTLY!! I will watch Harry Potter or something in 2015 and laugh at the Marks & Spencer TV ad, saying, "Who the hell is Rupert Everrete??" "Who is that bitch in corsette??" Anyway...

Dopie, man,

I wanna shop your veggies......!!! And stop telling me that the first dance is one of the requirements for my application.

I Wanna Shop Your Veggies!!

That is definitely THE line for this Christmas. I will doubtlessly shout that at random people and freak them out. The Christmas Party went well. Yeah, better than well. (Yeah, he wants meeee...) Had about 8 pints of Carlsberg, I was merry though was funnily sober enough to walk my boss home. What a nice person am I? Am SOOO in love with Dopie-dude, for him to slurrrr pints off while I grab him and shout, "You are a terrible, terrible boss and I hate you!!" I turned up to work this morning and wasn't fired, so, there you go. Free cheers to COSTA land.

Smash that Thug

I've decided to tell my EX that I am getting married. In my opinion, this goit woudn't leave me alone even if I have done so already, so I didn't tell him. Rather wanted to keep away from the goit all together. But now, he's asking me for threesome with his new ex and just simple shag every week. I've got to tell him to sod off. What is the best way to do this? I want to see him REACT (so am going to meet the guy when I tell,) hopefully gobsmacked. Any idea for doing it? Anyone?

3SUM

My ex txts me, asking if I want to have threesome with him and a girl. I hate this guy since he left me for another girl, and we haven't spoken since. I was taken by quite a shock, so txted back saying no. But also was a bit curious on his recent sexual life, so txted again asking who he's asking me with. Turns out, HE WAS ASKING ME TO HAVE THREESOME WITH HIM AND THE GIRL WHOM HE LEFT ME FOR. Oh, yeah, I got tricked there, I called him and yelled and yelled. He hooked up with this girl after he dumped me, (he left me saying he met someone he'd like to go out with,) and they broke up after a few months, now she is coming back from wherever for a holiday shag, and they thought it would be brill to ask me. Oh, sod off, you are sodding lunatic psycho.

Christmas Partyyyy

Am off to the annual staff party tomorrow.

In my sad social life, this so SADLY is the biggest event of the year, especially since I've managed to hook up with my boss in one of these, though, must say, am not that looking forward to it.
It usually runs for 12 hrs, and I never drink that hard else time.

Come to think of it, the biggest non-alcoholic event of the year is, clearly, the Summer Ball, which leads, without fail, to about 10 hrs of drinking and makes the whole thing 30 hrs or so to complete.

I must wonder though, WHY I always get drunk with work people, as in, with my bosses??

I remember the last time I got dumped, I began drinking the second he left my place, start calling mum 15 min later (already drunk), crying for next 4 hrs, went on drinking at my local for another few hrs... and the bosses were there.

I love them, in a very selfish AND a self conscious way; I am well aware that they don't love me and that I can't count on them. But they are (again, sadly,) very knowledgeable on my love life, and I do know that if I bitch about my ex, they will do nothing but to slag him off, because they just KNOW.

It is like a lukewarm bath, you are too comfy sitting in it, and you just know it is harshly cold when you get out of it.

With much appreciation,

Your Executive Kitchen Bitch.

Bloody Phoebe

http://www.dailyceleb.com/

Oh, please just kill Phoebe Price, she is EVERYWHERE!!

Does this woman ever take a break from attending celebrity parties???

She's been photographed like 3 times more than

"The It Girl" Miss Paris Hilton.

This is absurd..

Bank Holiday

Is this bank holiday today? And so, why am I working?

Underwear Eater

is in my flat. she is locked up in the cage to do her time now. (Refer My Photo.)

Marquee

Got attacked by a tent. Was working in a tent and bloody British summer wind blew the entire tent, or marquee, off into sky, knocking off few of us, carrying it for half way down the hockey field, dumping it on (thank goodness) nobody. I was actually hit by a large extension cord carrier (red in colour and weighs about half a stone) on me cheek, not the metal poles, but still. My face has sort of a black eye, though it is NOT on the eye area. Work mates kept asking how was my face. It actually hurts in weird places (like me teeth and my gum) and in our Grand Summer Ball I had to wear Christina Aguilera like thick make up so customers wouldn't be put off from buying chips and bangers. It's been a week since and is just getting worse. And boss just rung me asking to do the same shift tomorrow. Thanks, Dopie (!)

Wedding Dresses and Bog Rolls

When looking for wedding dresses, they all appear to be white (except for few of these for 2nd or 3rd timers, which are obviously in real colours.) But, in fact, they are all in different shades, like, ivory, dark ivory, gold, pink, or even blue. When was looking for them, it felt like looking into shades of bog rolls. They actually have so much in common, like, they don't have shades of black (NEVER), all shades are very subtle, and that they want to appear to be clean. Thought, that was significant.

Unisex

It's not only in Ally McBeal you find them, yes, we do have a unisex. I don't get this since we hire so many bouncers to keep tracks of people who go in there, and so if anyone doesn't come out for over 5 min they go in and ask them to stop shagging in the cubicle. All we got to do is to have another toilet. I am, actually, a bit tired of explaining that that is a unisex like 50 times a night. It IS surprising how many people get coy about peeing with opposite sex present in the room. Again, this is so wrong to have a unisex with condom dispensers in it.

CIA

does web site to seek candidates for the position??? Can I apply to be a spy over the internet now??? I was still shocked to learn you folks do divorce via drive-throughs. I'm suing Damian. Apparently, can do that over the ineternet, too.

Isn't it amazing how

People do anything for a shag? I saw the laziest people at work began moving like a hamster on a wheel all of sudden one night, and scurrying off into darkness with customers afterward. I must say I do that, too, though, not exactly for a shag. This makes me wonder, though. If I was mopping the floor like the fastest forwarding video tape, just because I know he may or may not be in my place, because I left my keys out in our little secret place, does that mean I like this guy? I was thinking how much I hate this guy and how much I do not wish to see him ever again up until the very last day. I rehearsed a million times how to say, "No, I don't want to see you tonight," over the phone, and he calls, what did I say? "Yeah, no probs, keys will be in the same place." What the fuck is wrong with meeee??? I don't even know if I like this guy or not!!! Even if I was degreasing the entire wall within 3 minutes.

DumbArse ND

Please do that again, put a stop-bath soaked funnel into a ID11 tank, so I can kill you. And, oh, yes, I will applaud you for washing your hand with the tap I was rinsing my film below in my tank. National Diploma my arse, they are worse than City and Guild. I just want to know why all the A Level photography students are such ignorant bastards/bitches. They have no respect for equipment and other ppl's stuff. Imagine they are going to be in Higher National Diploma course in a year or two. No wonder this college is polluted with stains and filled with broken machinery. It is not that difficult to know that the darkroom is not a place to have sex, And that if you break something we all have to pay, And if you ruin my fucking work I can sue your arse. Yeah, that's the reason why I stopped going to the college. I was thinking that in my tutorial, but couldn't say so.

Film

Was asked to star in a film. I can really have fun by messing the whole thing up (it's a foreign language film) by translating the lines with tweeking. They will never know what I am really saying. It certainly is an advantage that I tell customers to sod themselves with a couple of large rats in heats, in different language with my most charming smile on and they'll never know. I can change a line of, "How about some breakfast," into, "You fancy a quickie?" and it'll be a blast. That was all I was thinking while this guys was telling me of the ideas of the film. I said yes.

Pepper bomb (silly)

Who ever gets pissed off would do this. It could be the salt bomb sometimes, I personally prefer pepper, is easier to clean up after. I mean, what sort of a brain you got on your bloody shoulder to think grabbing handful of pepper bags and throw them at me would be fantastical, just because I wouldn't give you extra cheese or extra red sauce on your chips. You are supposed to be in the height of your academic career, you are a uni student, shouldn't you care to at least debate on that, on the number of nuggets, on the position of cheese on chips, on the temp. of buns, instead of throwing bloddy salt 'n' pepper, even if you are wankered with snaky B. I would be more than happy to debate on them topics with as much knowledge on every subject as possible, before the closing argument; "I'm not serving you." in addition to the snapping finegr at the securities, so you'd be escorted out. That's why I am EXECUTIVE kitchin bitch.

Nuggets

"You serve the best chicken nuggets in here," was told so. "You make the menu into something actually edible," was the least of compliment of all. "I get them only from you," was probably because I givem them for free. That's all becasue, well, I care.

So in love

When in a darkroom, when facing down to that stinky liquid under the glow of the orangy safeness-almighty, dipping the resin coated into that wave and wait, dip, dip, dip, there you go, I see your eyes, I see the lines of your brows, I see you nostrils and there goes your lips. that is the only moment I truly fall in love, I am pierced by your eyes in the waves. Using a machine to do that is like making love to a vibrator, maybe less messy and safe and all, but I never get you, you come out high and dry, where is my fun? I want you in those waves, rocking, swinging, repeat as needed. The other day I was facing to them machine, waiting for my angel to come out, high and dry, I suppose, I was all alone, kneeling down so I can catch you before thrown into the tray, and you have landed into my palm, with wings with drips of blood, dark grey blood, with streaks of shadow, probably from the x-ray, and oh dear god, I got it, I was all yours, without waves, couldn't stand up, had to touch the grains on your wings, they were almost flipping, with pixels dust all around.